(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Well I felt the need to write this thread because it probably applies to most of us here and recently someone in my area got in trouble for having sex with someone underage. It was on his eighteenth birthday and he was out with his girlfriend, she's fourteen (I know right, gag central). He was going out with his GF for a long time and from what I hear he genuinely loved her, lets just assume he did. They were out drinking and went back to the GF's house and one thing led to another and they ended up having sex. During sex the GF's mother walked in and caught them and she wasn't impressed to say the least! The mother immediately rang the police and reported the BF as a rapist (it's technically statutory rape as anyone under 17 in Ireland cannot give sexual consent). To make matters worse the mother is forcing the GF to say her boyfriend had sex against her will, which was untrue as far as I know.

So how would you feel in this situation? Try to focus on all sides of the story. How would you feel as the boyfriend, more than likely about to face a jail sentence, your name on a sex offenders register and a break-up with the girl you love (the break-up is what I predict will happen).

How would you feel as the girlfriend? You're about to lose the person you love for a long time, probably forced not to see them again and being put under huge amounts of pressure to lie in court.

How would you feel as the girlfriend's mother? You just caught your little baby in bed with someone far older than her, you have the power to make his life a misery, does he really deserve that?

How would you feel as the boyfriend's parents? Your son is just eighteen, his life is only beginning and now he is abut to be weighed down. Would you try and get him out of the country, would you threaten the girlfriend's mother?

It's quite a sticky situation and for all of you who think the law is the law so let him have it here is something else to consider. Nature intends us to be sexually active at a young age(from when girls have their first periods and boys can produce sperm), that's a fact you can't ignore. Can you blame these two horny, drunk teens for having sex when every fiber of their bodies is telling them to, after all they are in love.

I think we can get a good debate going on this, there are a lot of things to consider and this situation will apply to most of us so let me know how you feel.

EDIT: By the way, don't just reply to this situation, how do you feel about underage sex in general? Does age really matter when you're in love? Have you had underage sex and did it have a negative or positive effect on your life? Just no more fúcking discussions on whether god is real or not (unless they are somewhat intelligent and add to the thread in some way). Kthanx.

-My reply to Needa, it may tie up some loose ends:

Originally posted by another user

Sorry Needa but most of those questions are going to have to stay unanswered because I don't know the people involved personally, I don't even know anyone who knows them personally to be honest. I just thought this was an interesting subject that would get a bit of a discussion going, you would be surprised how often this kind of thing happens, in Ireland at least.

Anyways on to your questions, I believe they were together for two/three months. I'm not sure if this was their first time having sex with one another, I think the boyfriend had sex before but I'm not sure about the girlfriend. I really can't tell you if the mother was trying to break them up before this, I can tell you, though, that the boyfriend is a bit of an asshole.

As for the middle schooler and high schooler thing they were both in the same school. In Ireland teens from the ages 12-18 go to the same secondary level school, I understand that as an American this might seem odd but that's just the system we have. How did they meet? Your guess is as good as mine, maybe a poke on facebook lead to a conversation and an exchanging of numbers, maybe a friend introduced them, to be honest I don't think it's that relevant to the situation but I can see why you find the story questionable with my hazy details. I'll try to find out more but don't hold your breath.

She isn't claiming physical rape, the mother is forcing her to. The mother obviously wasn't happy seeing her daughter growing up too quick so she just wants the boyfriend to be gone as long as possible, which is understandable. Although it's extremely unfair and dishonest because, as far as I know, the girlfriend intended to have sex.

I would definitely agree with your last statement but when you're young, drunk and in love it's hard to think clearly. Teens do stupid and impulsive things all the time so saying that the boyfriend was exceptionally stupid would be unfair I think.

The thing is that he will still be convicted if his girlfriend says she wasn't raped, although it will more than likely shorten his sentence. It is completely wrong that the mother is making the girlfriend lie, she obviously is more worried about getting the boyfriend convicted than what her daughter feels.

OK, this is an interesting topic for discussion largely because, age of consent if bullshit.

I know people in their mid-20's who are virgins and people who where having regular sex at 15. It all depends on the person. Some people are ready far earlier than others and really the age of consent was there just because it was the best law they could come up with at the time. Personally, I find it incredibly flawed.

In USA it's 18, in Canada and UK it's 16 (soon to be lowered in UK), in France, Germany and a couple of others it's 15, in most of Europe, Russia, Japan etc. it's 14. In Spain and Brazil the legal age in only 13.

From my perspective, honestly, I think he went too far. At his age he was likely too forward and she probably felt pressured into sex. Hopefully this isn't the case, but it seems likely which is why I'd personally as a parent want to be as open as possible with my future children. I'd want them to feel they can have sex if they want to but instill in them a sense of perspective. It doesn't have to happen as soon as you're able. This makes teens feel more confortable with there relationship and they don't rush everything because they think it's their only shot.

That said, at 14 teens have sex, and I'm a prime example. I'm almost 26 years old now, I'm not currently sexually active and don't plan to be in the near future, but as a teenager I was at it so much I literally broke my bed... twice... DURING!

I became sexually active at 15 but didn't have actual sex until a couple of months after my 16th birthday. My girlfriend at the time was 14, and she turned 15 six weeks after. So there was a little under a year and a half between us. At the time, we had been together for 6 months, which when you're a teenager is pretty much a lifetime. We stayed together for over 3 years, only breaking up because I left for University and long distance relationships don't work.

I can say quite comfortably that both me and my girlfriend knew what we where doing and had planned to become sexually active. My parents knew, because I told them that we were taking our relationship to the "next level" because I didn't want it to be awkward with them trying to casually find out (as parents do). They where uneasy as I expected but so long as we used contraception they where fine.

Having sex at a young age did neither of us any harm, and while we'll both readily admit we where hormonal teens who really where just lustful and loney mistaking it as love, neither of us regret what happened.

So, what do I think should happen? Nothing. I think the girls mother is being far too controlling and all she's ensuring is she will never know what her daughter get's up to in the future. After all, my parents where reasonable, we confided in them. My girlfriends parents tried to control our relationship and refused to allow us in the bedrooms alone for example, they had no idea I was banging their 15 year old little girl about 5 times a week... why, because we did it at my house.

Honestly though, for an objective opinion, I'm the last person to approach because my opinion is extremely liberal here. I think sex is great and teens will try to have it anyway, so you're better off just letting them while ensuring they get proper sex education and access to contraception. It's a natural urge that we have from puberty, and to expect everyone to surpress it for literally years is quite frankly, mad.

As a person in a neutral position to both sides of this case, i'd have to say I would side with the mother in some respects since it's her daughter and she only wants the best for her. If you're 18 and wanting to have sex with someone in their young teens, consensual or not, you're just asking for trouble.. the age of consent is written in law for a reason and if you don't abide by it then you're ultimately going to face the consequences. To make matters worse he had sex with her in her parents house, that's pretty much beyond stupidity.

Sure they've got a connection and you could say it's true love but he should know better at his age that nothing good can come of it... apart from that sweet, sweet climax all over her breasticles.

In court they could say as a role model he had a responsibility to take care of her due to the age difference, so getting drunk with her wouldn't exactly help his case if he did get accused of rape (which I think is wrong of the mother to do). Personally as a 19 year old I wouldn't even consider going with anyone less than 17.

The age variations on consensual sex in Europe is pretty crazy:


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Couldn't disagree more. Sending this guy to prison for fúcking his girlfriend is absurd. Perhaps she is a bit young and it's a foolish mistake to have sex so early, but it's their mistake to make and I think it's patently immoral to lock someone up for doing what they did. They had sex, he didn't beat her up and throw her down the stairs for god sake.

---------- Post added at 07:23 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:22 PM ----------



Hmmm, I was wrong. I though Germany's AOC was 15... close enough.

I don't think the mother is really looking after her daughter though. It would(will) tear her apart to see her boyfriend locked up. The mother had this young man's life in the palm of her hand and she just squished it in between her fingers.

The courts will see it as rape, that's just how it works over here with underage sex. It's crazy really that the girlfriend has such a little say in the matter.

It incredibly sad for a number of reasons and highlights a number of issues.
Hope this does not screw up the dudes life. Does highlight that cases need to be viewed on a case by case base.
For starters in order to tackle this issue we need to get over the issue of sex. It been a taboo far far too long within are society.
We need to get past sex and teach are kids not just the basics but the meaning and uses. Along with explaining it from when they are young.

It time we become open about it. So when kids grow up they are doing it safe but are doing it at the right time. Also understand what it means and that lust does not always mean love.

The age of consent should only be lower when we remove sex as a taboo.

It very easy for me to say the mother is over controlling her daughter. Looks like it but i don't know all the facts. Do understand the mothers fear that her daughter is growing up too fast.
It also very easy for me to say the guy was at fault. Again i don't know if he started it or what. I don't know if he loves her for real or just lust.
Would say that he should never done it based on the mothers reaction. Should been open with the mother that one day it going to happen.

Mother and daughter need to be more open with each other. And daughter needs to talk to the mother about it. Ask her questions etc
It quite sad that all parties are at fault.

I totally agree with tornado on this one if the girl accepted and she went with it then it wasn't against her will and like in Europe it happens all the time but again it depends on the person, they're ready when they're ready

Sorry I took so long to reply I was out last night and when I returned home I only had time for a quick post, hope you didn't think I just milked you for a bump.

I think your last point is one that we should all bear in mind, whether you agree with it or not it is a valid point. I do believe that biological urges have more control over our sex lives than our minds, at least when in you're in your teens anyways. I've always tried to express myself sexually as much as possible (not by whipping my dick out at every chance or anything of that sort) because I believe if you repress and bottle up your sexuality you can have warped views towards sex and relationships. This is sort of off topic but it needs to be said too.

I would also like to comment on this: "Having sex at a young age did neither of us any harm". This may be the case for you and many other couples but at thirteen, fourteen and even fifteen some kids may not be emotionally or mentally available for sex. If you have it before you are ready then the chances are you will be afraid to be sexually active when you get older. Also, the older you get the more likely you are to be ready to have sex. This isn't much of an argument though, you may not be ready for sex until your very old, your twenties perhaps, but the law should not tell you when you should start having sex, I would barely listen to my own mother if she told me when I should be having sex!

I think all parents should be open about sex with their children as not many teens are going to do what you did and tell their parents that they are banging. Sex is quite a taboo subject, well at least it was when our parents were growing up. I remember my mam telling me that when she was watching the TV as a child with her parents whenever two people kissing was shown my grandparents would change the channel. Growing up with that how could you not be uneasy with sex? Parents are just going to have to "man-up" and have that awkward conversation with their children multiple times to cover everything, then we will be one step closer to having this ridiculous law changed!