I'm standing outside my friend John's rave in need of advice. About an hour ago I met this kinky blonde girl named Susan who works part time as a nurse's assistant. We were drinking a bit and she told me she used to be a hardcore heroin addict and was considering getting back on it because of how miserable her life has been. I'm a pretty experienced tripper, myself, so I convinced her that it would be better to try some shrooms than get back in to the opiates. I walked her over to the den but this girl Kelly and her boyfriend were in there doin' the grownup so I told her we should try another room, she told me she didn't trust me and I got tight and told her to shut up and chew a mushroom. She said she might as well try it because of how whack the party had gotten but I walked away for a few minutes to smoke a bogey and when I came back, she had eaten the whole bag!
She started screaming for me to go away and said she didn't know me and that she needed to go puke. I freaked and tried to calm her down but she just couldn't grasp that I never intended this to be anything major, I just wanted to make her appreciate nature. I tried to get her to stop crying but she started screaming about how her father raped her at a young age. Within a few more minutes, she was bitching to a plant about how she's in her mid-twenties, not married, and can't cook, I tried to calm her down again but she was convinced that I was her dad. So I told her to stop trying to swallow her tongue and that I would go find Dave, my boy that gave them to me. The dude was taking a monster sh*t but then I told him that there was a girl upstairs talking to plants, chopping her hair off, and drinking lysol. None of us have ever seen anyone eat as many caps as she had, girl is buggin.